We are bigger than our egos

Lately, I’ve been thinking about why the world is so dysfunctional. Two things come to mind - faulty egos, where one person feels like they have to one-up another, and second, the possibility of losing our security, financial or otherwise. Both of these are important but the first can be addressed with energy healing, so I’m going to focus my attention on that one - integrating and redirecting the ego’s energy. 

 

I've been giving this a lot of thought recently, and I believe that most of the damage caused by humans can be explained by two big factors:

• Faulty Egos & Emotional Pain, where one person has to outperform another to feel good about themselves. They might have childhood trauma that makes them feel inferior, hurt, angry or vengeful. Those core wounds lead to actions that harm others in ways that are unnecessary - whether it's a snide comment or something more direct. The faulty ego might get pleasure from feeling superior, but that satisfaction is filtered through a wound. Pain is on background refresh; any efforts to do well suffer because of it. Everyone loses.

• Fear of Loss / Scarcity. It's assuming that there aren't enough opportunities for everyone to win at life. This might be literal - not enough money, or psychological (not enough praise, which brings us back to the first point; a damaged ego). For example, if one restauranteur opens a sushi restaurant and gets lots of good reviews, another chef might feel like they will lose customers. To be honest, this is based on real-life economic conditions and it’s a healthy human response. Competition is normal - a necessary survival mechanism, but my intuition tells me that aggressive competition and defensiveness happen because most of us are not aligned with our uniqueness or our vision. This is what I learned in business school too - differentiate your biz, your personality and your products. From a spiritual point of view, there is a part of your soul that taps into your life purpose and what no one else can match. 

Healing your ego might involve integrating an overblown ego that pushes people away, but it could also be a dysfunctional ego that makes a person act small or insecure. 

We want to assert ourselves, without going overboard and wreaking havoc on other people’s lives. One of the insights from my spiritual psychology classes is needing to set that boundary yourself; long term peace and stability is found when everyone thrives. Pluto in Libra generation here ♎️

The Ego is not Bad

>> We all have egos, and to quote a psychologist friend, you need your ego to prop you up and give you strength. Don’t get rid of your ego. Unfortunately, the unhealthy parts of the ego sabotage us in unique and often sophisticated ways. 

Read my books to heal yourself and join me on YouTube for meditations. I also offer healing sessions. A lot of self-healing is about developing confidence in yourself and releasing beliefs that paint you into a corner, beliefs about yourself and the world.

 

Heal yourself 💜💜💜💜

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When I’ve done meditations to strengthen my sense of security, my intuition points me to this matrushka metaphor. Your full / higher self is a lot bigger than your ego / human self. And there is a part of us that has infinite growth potential. That said, I’m still a work in progress (aren’t we all), but today I asked for guidance. This is it.

Reiki hugs, 

Regina 

***

Regina Chouza is an energy healer, astrologer and author of A Personal Guide to Self-Healing, Cancer & Love and Chakra Healing & Magick. She holds a BA in Philosophy from Tufts University; Regina’s passion is bringing self-love, joy and empowerment to healing pursuits. Read her books to awaken your intuition and channel energy healing. Available on Amazon.

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SHK

Competition in Spiritual Businesses

So, I had a problem with a colleague years ago and I never wrote about it - without going into the details, when I was a healing student, I had a lot of fun in class and made good friends (which was one of my main interests). The people who share your interests become your friends. When this becomes your job, as it did for me, the people who share your interests could be your friends, but they often turn into competitors. And that gets sticky. I have found myself experiencing a lot of the frictions that I used to have in the corporate world. It’s because at the end of the day, even if we run spiritual businesses, we are still all human. So let's say you're really into runes or tarot or crystals or chakra healing - and you want to teach a class on that. Other teachers and healers might not like it.

I used to address this by doing a bit of a tribute to friends who focused on themes that I wasn’t working on professionally, but that I had spent a good amount of time on, personally. So for example, if I was talking about runes, I would mention so and so. When I began posting about those themes online, or doing a class, some would respond well (most did). Eventually I realized that I didn't want to do tributes anymore, and I stopped. It wasn't the best approach as it kept me from owning my experience, and in hindsight, it was not the best friendship dynamic. I think it was a coping mechanism, after I had push back. Spirituality is a business now, and that’s ok, but it’s also a way of life.

I share so many things online. The push back did come after adverts. But in general, are visual posts there to catch people’s eyes, or just that I am interested in that topic? I still approach what I post online as sharing what I am into, what I have learned, and what I am doing at the moment. I consider the classes I teach, and energy healing sessions as my job. If it's a class, a ton of time goes into prepping it. If it's a Facebook post, it might be a thought that went through my mind. If it's a one-to-one session with clients, the energy healing technique will be one where I spent a lot of time training, to offer that service. 

I write about things I’m into - you have to let that guide you. It’s part of being authentic. There isn't a huge difference between what I research, what I study for pure enjoyment and what could turn into a business opportunity someday. Blogging is my way of getting ideas out there. Social media is different; it gets you out there, in front of people. I had push back after branching out.

Maybe it’s normal, but we do have to maintain our boundaries. If it's clear that a relationship has become strained, maybe it's best not to mention them, nor to build on what we might have learned from them. It depends on the situation, and what that was. With this in mind, I have deleted a few blog posts and content that referenced colleagues, while still exploring all of my interests. I felt like this would be the best and maybe the cleanest way forward.

Thinking out loud, 

Regina 

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Reiki hugs, Regina 

I’m the tiger from my nightmares 🔥🔥🔥

Growing up, I had a recurring nightmare where we were having lunch at my grandmother’s house. The wall came tumbling down and a roaring tiger came out from behind. Everyone went scrambling - my aunts, uncles, cousins and family friends who were there for lunch. My 8- year old self ran and hid behind a big black piano. 

It didn’t look like exactly my grandparents' house, for one, we seemed to be eating on large picnic tables. I have a clear image of one of my aunts staying put, the rest of the people were hazy. The walls were made of carton too; it didn't keep anything back. 

I would stay huddled behind that piano bench, scared that the tiger would eat me. It paced back and forth but it didn’t feel angry or hungry. My inner child was terrified, as you would be if a tiger suddenly appeared in front of you and you were stuck there. 

After a few weeks of this recurring dream, one night I was watching the tiger and I suddenly realized that it was a dream. The tiger wasn’t there. But unfortunately, someone at school had told us that if you died in a dream you would then die in real life. So I hid from that tiger for years....  

 

Decoding Dreams

Fast forward about 35 years and I asked a Jungian psychologist for recommendations on child psychology books. At the time, I wanted to enroll in a counseling masters but I wasn’t sure what style to adopt. 

He recommended an author called Donald Kalsched and I read a book on dreams, nightmares and what they have to tell us. The ebook was super expensive so I got the Kindle in Portuguese 🇧🇷: O Mundo Interior Do Trauma (The Inner World of Trauma).  

My Portuguese isn’t great but this is what I learned. The book is good, by the way: 

• According to Kalsched, the elements in the recurring dream, or nightmare in my case, are parts of your psyche that are trying to protect you, while also revealing an unconscious complex. It's all you in the dream. 

• He calls those complexes archetypal self-care systems (translating from Portuguese) and they have energy and personality in our dream state and unconscious. I imagine they influence our behavior while we are awake too, in knee-jerk reactions? 

• We can revisit the dream to decode it; as far as I can tell, this is part of counseling sessions. My approach was to send healing to that part of me with Reiki and energy healing.

Here are my insights. I read the book two years ago but I'd forgotten about it until recently, when a song made it click.   

• If you die in a dream, you don’t die in real life. Obvious, but my inner child needed to hear that. Yesterday I started there and then sent healing to the part of me that went into hiding... 

• I‘d already been connecting with Inanna, the goddess of music and war, after a meditation where Katy Perry’s Roar came up. I was trying to make friends with a tiger but my inner child was still terrified. In energy healing, that’s a fragmented part of your psyche that that has to be brought back into the fold, gently. 

• A few weeks ago I realized that the tiger represents various elements (or characters) in the family tree  - it’s a pattern and an energy that is powerful and that had the intention of standing up for us. The piano and the tiger represented two sides of the same coin, funny enough. That energy represented visibility and presence.

• But as a child, and even more recently as an adult, big displays of emotion threw me off. That energy was terrifying to me as a kid, because of the emotion and the tiger image. My adult self isn't scared; I like the idea of a tiger spirit animal. 

That tiger was always larger than life in my unconscious, but when I bring it up and integrate it into my personality, it's amazing. This is what I need to go out into the world confidently and to keep from recoiling. So yes, awesome; the antihero becomes the antidote. I'm the tiger, it's me 🔥🔥🔥

Intuitively, I've felt that tiger walking with me during meditations, and leaping out of my solar plexus chakra, into the world. Here is the song that inspired this aha moment!

Anti-Hero by Taylor Swift  

BTW -  I’m fluent in English, Spanish, so-so French and I speak a little Italian. I don’t speak Portuguese but it’s similar enough to work it out. Got through a third of the book, just enough to decipher this dream. 

For now my energy healing books are available in English and Spanish 🦁

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Reiki hugs,

Regina 

 

***

 

Regina Chouza is an energy healer, astrologer and author of A Personal Guide to Self-Healing, Cancer & Love and Chakra Healing & Magick. She holds a BA in Philosophy from Tufts University; Regina’s passion is bringing self-love, joy and empowerment to healing pursuits. Read her books to awaken your intuition and channel energy healing. Available on Amazon.

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> Español: @AngelMedium33

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Release Inner Blocks to Love, Happiness and Success

There is a song that I love by the Mexican artist, Julieta Venegas, because she walks away from something (a relationship) that she might deserve, but doesn't want. 

It got me thinking about whether we get what we deserve - or what we reach for. And in many cases, what we tolerate. That's in terms of creating the life you want to experience. We need to think bigger.

 

It's cool to work on healing your self-worth, your boundaries, and to revisit what you think you deserve in life and relationships. Believing that you don't deserve a particular experience is a block; it takes away from your personal initiative and negotiating power. But objectively, lean into what you want to experience, regardless of whether you or others think you deserve X, Y or Z.  

Today I'm asking myself what is possible, not what people think should happen. The realm of possibilities is the playing field.

 

On a side-note, most healers and empaths are very tuned into other people's feelings and needs. I know this applies to me. Often, I find myself wondering if a lucky break isn't more deserved or needed elsewhere. This is one of the patterns that I needed to heal and release. It clicked for me a few weeks ago, when I listened to this lovely song: 

Listen to your intuition, not the voice of your ego. The ego makes us feel smaller, its sabotage keeps us from achieving our potential. The flip side would be to assume we deserve more than others (also ego). 

One of my spiritual psychology teachers suggests connecting with that part of yourself, understanding how it seeks to protect you, and having an inner dialogue so that its energy can be repurposed to empower you. Release the belief that leads to self-sabotage. You can do this in any energy healing session, simply by setting the intention to fill that part of yourself with love, forgiveness and lots of healing. 

I’m working on this now but I wanted to share these insights. Self-healing is a work in progress; we don’t have to be perfect and aiming for that keeps us from reaching our potential. As my middle school soccer coach used to tell us, if you wait for the perfect shot you’ll never score a goal. 

Free yourself with a bit of self healing! Join me on Youtube for meditations to go with my books. Enjoy and please share 💜 

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Reiki hugs, 

Regina Chouza

> Please Note: I’m energy healer, not a psychologist. I have taken a few spiritual psychology classes out of curiosity.  

***

Regina Chouza is an energy healer, astrologer and author of A Personal Guide to Self-Healing, Cancer & Love and Chakra Healing & Magick. She holds a BA in Philosophy from Tufts University; Regina’s passion is bringing self-love, joy and empowerment to healing pursuits. Read her books to awaken your intuition and channel energy healing. Available on Amazon.

 Facebook - Instagram - YouTube 

> Español: @AngelMedium33

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The Ego Thrives on Comparison

Throwing a few thoughts out there because I can’t sleep 😅 It dawned on me today that the ego can only exist in relation to something else, it doesn’t stand on its own legs. It also has to be seen, which isn’t bad; we all need to be seen and loved.

But wouldn’t it be cool if your true self or your Higher Self shone through instead? So instead of comparing yourself with others and having that be the reference point for the ego, align your ego with your Higher Self and all of its joy, light and potential.

This shift can be done on both feeling and mental levels. The belief that we can be more or less than the person next door is where the ego starts. It needs comparison to exist, a point of reference.

One of my reiki teachers, William Rand, tells us that we can heal the ego so that it becomes a force for our light & purpose to shine in the world. I think the first step might be to stop comparing ourselves with others. Kabbalah tells us to look to our potential, instead of focusing on the material world and what's already been done and dusted.  

A shift in perspective

Let’s try a new approach. When it comes to metrics where it feels like you've fallen short, fill that part of yourself with love and understanding. Don’t beat yourself up about it, and work with the feeling of not living up to an expectation. Where does the metric come from? Is it relevant and necessary?

If it is still relevant, heal yourself and try again. Turn your attention to your Higher Self and move in that direction - what path feels right to you? Read my book to go deeper with self awareness and intuitive healing: Chakra Healing & Magick.

Chapter 4 includes questionnaires that will get you thinking about your sense of self on a deeper level, while the sections on psychic abilities and energy healing will guide you towards your Higher Self. 

That part of your soul taps into your full potential; your Higher Self powers your goals more than the ego ever could. We can't do that if we are focused on others, and all of the icky feelings that come from comparing ourselves. Hence the need for healing and reframing.

This is what I'm clearing now. 🍎🍎🍎

Reiki hugs,

Regina 

***

Regina Chouza is an energy healer, astrologer and author of A Personal Guide to Self-Healing, Cancer & Love and Chakra Healing & Magick. She holds a BA in Philosophy from Tufts University, and qualified as an energy healer at the School of Intuition & Healing UK. Her passion is bringing self-love, joy and empowerment to healing pursuits. Read her books to awaken your intuition and channel energy healing.

 Facebook - Instagram - YouTube 

> Español: @AngelMedium33

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Shine your Light Unapologetically

The sun is at 29 degrees Leo today - that is my North Node in my astrology chart. It represents what I need to do to bust out of limiting patterns. The key message is to shine without dimming my light. I’ve been working on it for a long time and although I have made big advances, there was still a behavioral pattern that I had to kick. 

Without going into the details of my natal chart, Leo rules my mission, destiny and happiness in life (if I choose to accept it) but I also have three heavy planets in the Earthy sign of Virgo, one that encourages us to be humble. And in my case, to hide my light because I didn’t want to be a show off, seem arrogant, or too self-centered. 

The North Node is completely outside your comfort zone; playing the observer comes naturally to me, but the North Node in Leo pushes me to take my place center stage. 

 

As you'll know from reading Diary of a Psychic Healer, I've been on a spiritual deep dive for 14 years.

I have this pattern where I downplay the amount of time, energy and diligence that has gone into my energy healing and spiritual studies. So for example, earlier this month I wrote an Instagram post that questioned the popular New Age Lionsgate trend. Instead of just saying “I don’t see this in the stars,” I began that post with a disclaimer of “if I am reading this right.” 

My intention was to imply that I didn’t have the truth, not that I didn’t know how to read charts. I wasn’t sure if that trend was rooted in aspect patterns with the planets being aligned, the time of year, or pop culture numerology. My guess was the latter. 

A friend shared my post on her wall. It was met by criticism from a lady who funny enough, mirrored the critical Virgo voice that runs through my mind: am I good enough, do I know enough, did I phrase this right? She questioned my astrology knowledge and implied that my content didn’t merit a share. I had a huge Aha Moment: I don’t have to defend my knowledge/worth to anyone, least of all a stranger online. 

I’ve also been blogging long enough to know that there are lots of ways to approach the stars and spirituality. 

This month’s lesson is not to downplay my talent or experience; something that I have been doing for far too long. Even in my corporate days, a friend insisted that I should put my MBA diploma on my wall (as another colleague did) so that people would know that I had a masters. I didn’t want to brag. Plus I thought it was enough that my bosses and HR knew. In hindsight I’m not sure that it would have made a difference because my commitment and ability to deliver were more than enough, too. 

Or so I thought… 

Since then I’ve had flashbacks to instances where I downplayed my track record with energy healing, and when I praised someone’s work in a way that made them believe they had more experience and stature than I did. Those interactions seemed harmless but the ego dynamic of ‘faux humility and shrinking to please’ creates an unbalanced relationship. It takes a lot to come back from that, no matter how long we’ve been on the spiritual path. Or maybe because of it; we need self-awareness and boundaries too. 

My life lesson has been to shine brightly and let whoever wants to stick around, stick around. It takes courage to shine your light no matter who is in your orbit, and not to feel too big (or too small) around someone who also has power. 

Also, my intuition tells me that if I don’t shine as brightly as I can, I’m not doing my part. The biggest lesson of all 🦁

Reiki hugs, 

Regina 

Ps…. Read my books - they are both awesome. Available on Amazon.     

***

Regina Chouza is an energy healer, astrologer and author of A Personal Guide to Self-Healing, Cancer & Love and Chakra Healing & Magick. She holds a BA in Philosophy from Tufts University; Regina’s passion is bringing love, joy and empowerment to healing pursuits. Read her books to awaken your intuition and channel energy healing. Available on Amazon.

 Facebook - Instagram - YouTube 

> Español: @AngelMedium33

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